Surviving, and Trying to Live a little.

Sorry, I'm not one of those party college kids. Well, maybe a little ;)

This is my third week in this giant world of education, and things are coming along.

I haven't failed anything yet, In fact I've gotten mostly 100% on my assignments.

My professors are all very nice, and great to work with, and I've already met many great friends which usually end up at my apartment on any given night.

Yesterday was a bit difficult. I'm getting to that point where I'm not a "new" freshman anymore, so I actually have to do my assignments and be on top of things. I can't just use the, "I didn't know" excuse anymore. I just had one of those days. One of those days where you get down, and hard on yourself, and lots of things go wrong, and you're just hungry. So I came home from this realization, and pretty much just crashed on my couch. My splitting head ache didn't help matters. 

Anyway, it was a bit of a rough day, but luckily, my wonderful roommates and neighbors helped my day end much better.

These wonderful ladies are a magnificent group of people. They helped me forget my troubles even if  it was for just a minute. After my nap, we went to get tickets for this saturday's football game, and topped it off with Aggie Ice Cream. They are some of the most fun, and yet intelligent people to hold conversations with, and I'm so lucky to be sharing living space with them. I love them to death!

I was still kind of down and having that really bad, rough day when the Ice Cream run was suggested, but I went, and these ladies changed my day for the better just like they always do :) 

Later, my neighbor invited us over for some Mario Cart action, which I'm a bit rusty at.... And Another guy from my ward came over later that night, and just chilled. All of these people, due to the small, insignificant things they do, make life up here worth living. And worth more than just existing for. When you spend 13 hours a day at school, it's easy to feel completely depleted and like you have absolutely no social life, but these guys make sure that there is never a dull moment in our apartment.

So, it was one of those days. 

But it was one of those days, where yeah, I was down, but sometimes you have to get down in order to find something, and It is helping me find how to be even better at this whole college thing. 

And I am getting better every day. Today, I've been a good girl, and haven't even skipped any practice sessions. Not even the one at 7:30 in the morning. I'm playing much better than I ever have, yet at the same time, I can hear how much farther I have to go, and I assure you, it is far. I have so much music to practice, there is literally not enough time in the day to complete all of it. But, I'm certainly trying my best.

So, I'm learning. I'm learning new things about the world, and most importantly about myself.

Something I tell myself every day, as I get up earlier, and get home later than most of my roommates. It can get rough up here. But I just have to keep telling myself why I'm here. WHY I'm doing this, and WHY people look at me and call me crazy. Because music is what I love, and I am the musician I am today because several people went through this very same thing a long time ago. 

I owe it to those kids in the future who will just thirst to be better at what they do. I don't care if all of my students in the future pursue music. Most of them will probably not. But I owe it to them to inspire them to live for the dreams they create. Not just let them exist while they sleep. I'm not just in this for music. (Though, I do adore it.) I'm in it to prove something to myself, and many, many people.

I'm in it to prove that I can do hard things, that I can live on my own. No, not just exist on my own, But LIVE on my own, and spread beautiful things in the little sphere in which I live. I'm in it to prove that dreams are never easy, but always worth it. And I'm in it to prove to myself who I really am. 

So, hard days will come and go, but I'm in this for the long run. Not just to go to a few parties and become a true aggie ;)